“Self-love” is very fashionable, the one that makes you love the best and the worst about yourself, that helps you not to self-sabotage, that feeds your self-esteem and makes you value yourself.
But, how healthy is that love? Are there limits to self-love? Is it valid to love each other so much that you don’t see beyond ourselves? Because yes, that type of self-love is what is taught on social networks as if it were a new school subject.
The so-called “coach” proliferates self-love advice and recommends starting to remove people from your life “who do not add up to you”, as if it were cleaning the closet.
I have always had a theme with this, I consider myself very self-critical and sometimes I have questioned my self-esteem, but it is not that I do not love myself, it is that I try not to blind myself, it is that the ties cannot be so fragile as to remove your family, friends or partner in your circle just because they don’t think like you or don’t leave you “benefits”.
And of course there are toxic people, who consume you, who harm you, but I am referring to the confusion that has been generated thanks to the fact that anyone with a camera believes they have the ability to advise, especially young people, who have come to even believe that if their parents do not allow them to “be”, then they should get away from them.
Dr. Sergio Oliveros, a psychiatrist in Madrid, establishes that there is sick self-love, the kind that needs the automatic gratification of its needs like a baby even in cradle time.
In general, this type of self-love blinds you to see beyond yourself, you estimate yourself so much that you do not recognize defects or are capable of admitting mistakes, it leads you to blame others for everything that does not go well in your life, and “putting yourself first” becomes your extremist philosophy of life.
I have seen that aura so many times, “where I arrive you have to see me”, “nobody does it better than me”, “it’s just that’s how it goes, because that’s how I like it” (even if it’s wrong).
The truth is that it is very good to love yourself and it is important, but doing it excessively is actually a symptom that something is not right with self-esteem, since this is a balance, which is lost when you want to be the center of everything.