The Census Goblins

Due to some mistake by government strategists, the national census, which should have been done this year, will be done in two years.

To carry out a census, the INE needs to be notified three years in advance, unless you want any results. The anxiety that exists at the moment refers to the number of citizens living in Santa Cruz, according to some.

There are those who believe that when this detail is known, it will be known how many citizens live in the other eight departments, a figure that changes every day. But those who know what it is about say that, in reality, the census will serve to find out how many ghosts exist in the country.

Because as they see us, Bolivian citizens have a number of ghosts, or electoral elves, that exceeds those of all other countries combined. That is not a merit that we can be proud of. Quite the contrary.

The truth, the pure truth, is that for every ten real citizens in Bolivia there is one unreal, invented, electoral goblin. And that happened in 2009, when a delegation of young Venezuelans arrived in the country and decided to invent, out of nowhere, just because Commander Hugo Chávez had ordered it, 1,200,000 other citizens. It was not a capricious figure. It was the result of knowing how many votes the MAS needed to win the elections without failing. In just ten days, between September 1 and 12, 2009, young Venezuelans attributed to Bolivian mothers the miraculous result of having given birth to 1,200,000 others 18 years earlier.

That is, it was like the anticipated Holy Spirit. Without knowing how to read or write, these mothers had given birth to citizens who in 2009 they were allowed to vote. Well, those citizens voted in 2014 and produced the miracle that the voters of Tarija and Cochabamba have been more than the voters authorized to vote.

The voters were 105% of the citizens of voting age, according to the real figures revealed by Enrique Velazco Reckling. And in 2019, those same citizens gave cocalero Morales the feeling that he had won the elections, when he had lost them, and he had to flee.

In order not to tire with figures, we must remember that in 2020 the citizen Luis Arce obtained 55% of the votes without knowing how to read or write, or count. In other words, the upcoming census will produce many surprises for Bolivians. Some will lose relatives that they had in the imaginary, or in the trout statistics, but who voted in all the elections. A Bolivia of masista fantasy. The trout Bolivia will be over.