I begin here a brief manual of lies that we tell and are told, and that we all know are, indeed, bigger lies than the spill theory, the productive revolution and the big salary and the threat that your nose will grow if you tell lies .
In these cases, lies work as a way of not getting into conflict, not to argue and in many cases to avoid a grip on punches. It is the classic “it looks great on you” from the saleswoman, the customary “I swear it’s the last time I’ll do it” or the everlasting “if so-and-so wins the elections, I’ll leave the country.” It is known that it is a lie, but nobody denounces it, nor throws it in your face. In other words: the reaction lies to you.
Let us then analyze some first cases from the world of work:
– “In this company we are one big family”: Obviously, no one can believe this hoax because as we all know, not even in a family are we all like one big family!
If they told me that, I can immediately glimpse the underlying hatred, the accumulated grudges and above all, the fight for the inheritance with a saw in hand. And the worst: if they are a big family, it is most likely that they have you as a child.
– “Yes. It is more work, there are more hours, but with your salary we make a package for everything ”: You went. They are telling you that they are going to cut off the part that would correspond to you for the new job that you now have to do for the same money. And whether you believe it or not, the end of the story is always the same: after two months you want to cut your pineal gland with a packaged mustache.
– Not only the lie is in the employer’s association. Just look at a resume where someone puts “language proficiency”. Knowing how to say “yes” and “no” in 4 or 12 languages does not mean mastering it. And if you don’t have Wi-Fi, even Google translator won’t help you. However, the recruiters, or as they are called now, the scouters, many times do not speak languages either and they put that if they did in the curriculum and that is why they prefer to take you because they make sure that they do not have someone really competent that can make them lose the post. If I had the opportunity to hire people, it would be enough for the applicants to master only one language: ours.
When choosing a type of lie that bothers me, I prefer the one from the food vendors: “Take it easy. Here we cook with very little salt” And it turns out that the Dead Sea water is sweet potato syrup with dulce de leche compared to the Russian salad. “Watermelon? laugh sweet. And no. It’s not sandy.” Here I always have the doubt: will he really believe what he says? Did you really try the watermelon and it seemed to you that it did not taste like fernet and that it did not have the texture of stuffed gofio? And worst of all: why do I still believe him after having tried his “juicy apples” sandier than the Sahara during the drought, his “milanesas re tiernitas” made of plywood and his “freshly baked croissants” with the smell of mufa and mothballs?
Another type of lie that really upsets me is unsolicited confessions, unsolicited information. “I’m not racist”. “I was never unfaithful.” “I sleep peacefully: I have all my papers in order and my taxes are up to date”. In other words: you are telling me that you are racist, unfaithful and an evader! The consolation I find in cases like this is that the guy, in addition to all that, sleeps very badly and restlessly. (And I think he sleeps uneasy because if he gives this information to everyone, sooner or later he’s going to end up sleeping in the shade. Unless he’s a Supreme Court Justice… but that’s another topic…).
Other blatant lies are those of friends or relatives who forget that we are few and we know each other: “Yesterday I did not call you for your birthday because there was no signal where I was” Really? Were you in a place with no signal for 24 hours? Where have you been: in outer space, at the Earth’s pole, sleeping inside a microwave?
“I don’t know what happened that I didn’t hear your call. Uh yeah, here it is: missed call.” It happened that you didn’t attend to me, that you didn’t want to, that you couldn’t or that you didn’t know, that happened!
The problem is that they tell you a lie and you can’t say “it’s a lie” to your face. You can not. It’s stronger than one, because you don’t want to fight, you don’t want to have a bad time or because you definitely know that if you tell everyone they’re lying to you, you’re going to be very alone in this life.
Next time we will continue with this infinite manual of lies. Now I have to leave them because… uh… It’s not that I don’t have a finish for this. It just so happens that I left the kettle on the stove and my grandmother is not feeling well and I have to take the dog for a walk. Really. I don’t lie to you!
