We see these stories in the world of entertainment, on television and in life itself. They are around 30 and they are 50. We associate these relationships with the search for fame, money, experience in bed or a maternal role. Among all these hypotheses, is there room for love?
One of the things that always gives people something to talk about in society is the age difference in a couple. Well, José José already mentioned it in his song that was released in the early 90s, “lies are all lies, things that people say, saying that this love is forbidden, that I am 40 and you are 20″.
There is men who choose to choose a woman much older than themselvesbecause as the song continues, “It is love that matters and not what people say”. Ultimately, these do ignore the gossip and they seek their happiness despite the difference in years.
But, let’s make a parenthesis and leave aside the cheesy and romantic, to delve into the psychological sphere and other areas in this type of relationship.
In this regard, the psychologist Paola Zapata explained in contact with HOY/Nación Media that, when we talk about the age difference in a relationship, almost always we suppose there must be other interests, but not love.
“When we see a older man with a younger woman, we tend to accept the relationship. However, when it is the other way around, when the The woman is older, she is questioned terribly, it begins to be disqualified because culturally it is understood that whoever is older deals with provide in the economic part and whoever is younger deals with other issues, generally in private”, argued the professional.
In this context, he indicated that there various factors that can influence a man can fall in love with a much older womansince it will depend on the cases.
One of them is the securitysince normally the woman is safer economic and emotional level because of the experience lived and, in case they are already mothers or grandmothers, they have a different vision of what life is.
“That, because of everything he experienced in life and that is where the younger couple learn from their partner. In other cases, on a psychological level, it is when the young he looks for a mother in his partner, to take care of him, protect him and be his support,” he explained.
Zapata maintained that likewise, these women can look for freshness and freedom in younger coupleswhere they can somehow have more control over the relationship because of the experience and give themselves that opportunity to still feel capable of being able to conquer (treat themselves).
He also said that these men are also interested in sexual experience that they could gain and, in the case of women, to free themselves sexually, since they are more confident in themselves and their bodywhere they are in a stage of enjoyment and enjoyment.
It is also important that we learn to not always looking for why they are together despite the big age difference. Remember that everyone has different needs and we must respect it, it is time for us to let’s get rid of prejudices and stereotypesand allow others to be free,” he advised.
But what are these men looking for in older women?
Some conveyed that receiving attention from an older woman increased their own level of confidence and self-esteem. Others recognized that older women have more life experience, emotional stability, are more focused and they can offer both honesty and different perspectives.
Throughout history there were this kind of love that lasted until eternity and without a doubt, surely a friend, family member or close one of ours lives this experience. Men in love with women much older than them. And finally, they apply what José José mentions in his song: “take my hand, walk with me, looking straight ahead”. Because despite the age, what matters is love.