Despite having a career as demanding as medicine, nephrologist Domingo Martínez found a balance between his work in the office and fatherhood
Dr. Domingo Martínez is a nephrologist recognized for his dedication and commitment both in his medical career and in raising his two children, Dereck, three years old, and Dylam, nine years old, an example of commitment and sacrifice for those around him.
With a demanding and challenging career in the medical field, he has managed to balance his responsibilities as a kidney disease physician with those of a family man, proving that it is possible to achieve success in both fields.
When he entered the world of medicine, Martínez’s objective was clear: to become a competitive professional in the market. “I became a good professional, to the point that the patient portfolio and responsibility absorbed me so much that I arrived home at 10:00 and 11:00 at night, nothing strange for any responsible doctor dedicated to his patients,” he said.
But one night he realized that his family needed them too.
“When my oldest son waited for me to help him understand some math exercises, I would arrive exhausted and I couldn’t help him,” said the doctor.
She describes how she couldn’t explain basic math exercises to him because he was so exhausted that he couldn’t understand them. “My own son would tell me: ‘You know what, Dad, I feel you’re really exhausted. I think you’d do well with a good bath and a rest, and we’ll figure it out tomorrow; that assignment is due on Friday, we still have two days to spare.’”
That was the moment when he understood that he was important to someone else, and that they also hoped that he would help them solve a problem that tormented them, as he did with many strangers who became his patients.
“I thought very secretly, I am failing as a father, so I began to organize my schedule, my patients, and my responsibilities,” he explained, and that is how his relationship with his children began to change.
When asked about the challenges he has faced in being a father and at the same time having a demanding profession like medicine, he confessed that the pandemic was the most terrible thing he had to live through, because he had to separate from his family, because no one had any idea of how contagion was at the beginning of that health crisis.
“It was difficult not to be able to hug someone you love in the midst of so much pain…”
“At that time, my wife Fanny Márquez was pregnant with my second child, and my oldest son couldn’t hug me because he was on the front line of health care. It was difficult not to be able to hug someone you love in the midst of so much pain, confusion, loneliness…” the doctor told elCaribe.
The doctor was invaded by intrusive thoughts such as death and the fact that his son would not be able to say goodbye to him… that’s how he said: “I have to double the biosecurity, because both my family and my patients need me.”
For Martínez, “being a father has been wonderful. In fact, I wouldn’t know what my life would be like without my children.”
Their role in raising their children.
His experience as a doctor has influenced his approach to parenting in very positive ways.
He said that he has had to practice medicine alongside his children, especially the eldest, who before accompanying him to his soccer games on the weekends, has to make medical visits, discharge patients, see some patient in the emergency room… “My son always tells me: Wow! I like what you do, I see that the sick look at you like a superhero. He has not yet defined himself as a doctor, but I have taught him about the responsibilities we have and that the most important thing for any person is their life, and the patient puts it in your hands and you cannot fail them. That requires many sacrifices that you will understand at some point, I explain to him, so as not to overwhelm him,” said the doctor.
When faced with demanding responsibilities, create an agenda
On what advice she would give to other parents who also have demanding careers, in terms of finding a balance between work and family, she explained that sometimes it gets a little difficult especially when both parents work. “I think that with good organization and responsibilities, you can achieve that balance between family and work, making an agenda that includes how everything will be done, even the dates and times for fun,” she said about what has worked for her.
Loves when they cook together
As a father, he enjoys doing many activities with his children, such as cooking together. In addition, you have to see the interaction he has with his eldest through social media when he asks him questions related to his career.
“They say that daddy cooks better than mommy (laughs), I think even my wife admits that (laughs),” the doctor emphasized.
She also enjoys leaving work to pick up her children from school. “Seeing the smiles and joy of how they welcome me steals my heart,” she said.
In his experience as a father, there are many anecdotes and lessons he has learned, assuring that “without children there is no family and without family there is no success.”
“Success is being able to enjoy everyday life, despite the stress; being healthy, having a job and being surrounded by the affection of family and friends,” he said.
When an emergency occurs
Being a doctor also means that when one of your patients has an emergency, you have to go out and assist them. “The hardest thing is having to break the schedule I have with my children, after waiting a while to go out and enjoy some adventure, because a medical emergency arises, and for reasons of responsibility I have to postpone the date,” Martínez revealed.
His wife understands and supports him when he fulfills his role as a doctor and leaves his family for later, but the children still have a hard time understanding the sacrifice of being a responsible doctor.
Among the activities or habits that he promotes at home to foster the health and well-being of his children, is the combination of sports and a balanced diet, above all, raising awareness of what the abuse of sugar and salt brings. “It is understandable that, as a nephrologist, there is a persecution in the family that they must hydrate themselves,” he concluded on the subject.
As a doctor, he has to manage the stress that comes with his job and his role as a father. “Well, I have no doubt that without God there is no balance, so my refuge will always be in Jesus. I have had to understand and live that not a leaf falls from a tree without the will of God, that each day brings its own worries.
Through prayers and meditations on the faith of our Lord Jesus Christ, I have learned to work on my emotions, my inner self, without neglecting to fulfill my responsibilities,” Martinez concluded.
Your children: a universe of love
When talking about his children, nephrologist Domingo Martínez highlighted their abilities and qualities. His eldest son is called Dylam Martínez Márquez (9 years old) and he described him as a child with extreme responsibility; hard-working, very sentimental, generous, loving, friendly, talented, with a good sense of humor and admirable intelligence; every year he receives recognition from his school. In addition to that, he said that he is a genuine companion and always wants to share everything he achieves.
Regarding Dereck Martínez Márquez, 3 years old, he highlighted that he has contagious wisdom, with a lot of character and personality. “Sometimes I wonder where he got that character from, but it is a mixture of emotions because of how sweet he is. He is affectionate to the point that he convinces me easily. He has tremendous energy and little interest in changing his mind, when we have to correct him,” the doctor pointed out.
